Right out of the oven:

Bakersfield teacher offers to trace (yes, trace) Mr. Johnson for some unsuspecting students - surprisingly he's only charged with two counts of "annoying" the students...One minute yer' havin' a Denver omelet, the next minute someones sticking a, er, crowbar in yer' face!...Talk about being in the wrong place at the wrong time: Park Ranger tracking rogue elephant spends night tied to tree after being mistaken for punching-bag by irate locals...Ign.com's Obscure Character of the Day column comes up with it's most piss-your-pants-funny entry yet, reminiscing about everyone's favorite weak-minded storm-trooper...While we're talking Star Wars, did anyone see this lunatic on American Idol? Or how 'bout this disaster?...Clown school President not clowning around when it comes to anti-clown editorials (be sure to read "chippydog's" two reader comments)...Wait a minute, I thought they were steadfastly saying (through their lawyer, of course) that they were merely victims of a visit to the zoo gone wrong? Oh that's right, most victims usually drink vodka, smoke dope and then taunt a 350 pound Siberian Tiger...And, finally, eyewitness accounts of rigged end-of-semester party at Canadian trade school report: "The first sign something was wrong was when the dizziness and nausea began to set in.

The "I really hate politicians, especially ones named Hillary Clinton" moment of the week:

Hillary Clinton has decided that the only way she can convince people to vote for her is to appeal to their lack of informed decision-making prowess by simply leveling attacks, no matter how skewed or preposterous, at her chief rival, Sen. Barack Obama. What really smokes The Cupcake about this manipulation is the blatant Republicanistic tactics she's been employing. From her "let's take the wind out of an entire movement's sails by playing armchair political historian" interpretation of the impact Martin Luther King had on his own movement to the implication that Obama in any way somehow supports the very un-liberal Reagan administration, she's sunk to a new low, even for someone named Clinton. Surprisingly, though, having been forced to re-evaluate Bill Clinton's legacy both against George W. Bush's ascendancy (the direct result of Oval Office fellatio and subsequent lies) and Barack's meteoric rise, her tactics look even lower. Especially when it comes to the double-standard she keeps propagating about her implied "vast" experience versus Obama's short political life...the last time I checked she'd only been a Senator for 7 years, with her most newsworthy contribution from that position being her vote on the Iraq War that authorized Bush's cowboy pilgrimage to the Middle East. This, of course, was preceded by her time in the White House, most famous for her failed health care policy, Filegate and the death of Vince Foster. So, she's right about her experience in a sense: she's proved to be a Washington-establishment lackey, someone who is unable to build a coalition to push through legislation, a criminal and, possibly, an accomplice to murder. That experience sounds like par for the course - in fact, it sounds oddly similar to the current President (I'll give Bush the benefit of the doubt that he's never been implicated in a suspicious suicide)...The way I see it, the best part about Hillary's campaign so far has been the collateral impact articles like this one have had on my funny bone. Other than that, I continue to be unimpressed with the other Clinton and am fully behind the Senator from Illinois. Obama brings a freshness and enthusiasm to America the same way Bobby Kennedy did in 1968. And, I don't think its a coincidence that that was exactly 40 years ago this year. We've had 7 Presidents since then; 1 resigned, 1 was impeached, 2 were related (and, not coincidentally, both bad), 1 was great (Am I the only person who understood what Barack meant when he was talking about Reagan?), 1 was not so great and 1 wasn't even elected. And, anything great accomplished during that span of time has been largely undone by the current administration...this country needs the hope Obama represents a lot more than a resume.
11th Hour Disclaimer: Today's Washinton Post featured an interesting editorial highlighting not only the hypocracy of Clinton's attacks toward Obama's Reagan observations, but also reminded us of another Presidental candidate who once praised the former President...a little man named Bill Clinton in 1991.

You should check out:

If you liked Cloverfield and haven't seen either of these sites yet, check them out asap:

Geeks of Doom
Cloverfield Clues

By the way, is anyone else out there tired of hearing people whining about the shaky camera thing? Seriously, these have to be the same losers from college that used to complain about professors who didn't speak English as a first language...

1 Comment

  1. dystemper909 On January 24, 2008 at 6:19 PM

    You know what's really sad about Americans and politics? The fact that the only person who had any real qualifications to be President had to drop out of the race. Bill Richardson had all of the qualifications necessary, but he just didn't have the base.

    As far as I can tell, if it weren't for the fact that Obama was African-American, he would just be another guy in a suit. If it weren't for the fact that Hillary Clinton did not have a penis, she would also be just another guy in a suit.

    The bottom line for me is that there is not one person left in this race that stands out and I can support. Ron Paul stands out, but I can't support him because he's either a bigot or politically ignorant when it comes to strategy. Truthfully, I am a politically minded man with no candidate to vote for.